As a birthday gift to myself, I stayed up until 4AM making an image where I’m riding on Kanye’s shoulders through a nebula for my phone’s background.

I’m so alone.

Kanye Reblogging Kanye // The Bubblegum Gang

The Real Story Behind Kanye West’s “Monster” Music Video

Watch the video before reading this.

Everyone’s talking about the violent, misogynistic and racial themes in Kanye West’s new music video for “Monster”. Sure, the clip contains cannibalism, demonic creatures and a plethora of dead white models, but I believe people are looking at it in the wrong way. The story of Kanye West, Jay-Z, Nicki Minaj and Rick Ross in this house of horrors is actually much more lighthearted than you’re being lead to believe. Here’s the real story behind the video:

Mr. West and co. were travelling across America, solving mysteries in their van, aptly titled “The Mystery Machine”, when they stumbled upon the haunted mansion in the video. Having vowed to eradicate the world of monsters, demons, bad music and other evils; they were forced to investigate.

Upon entering they realised they had stumbled upon a cult made up entirely of vampiric, white, female models, a common occurrence throughout the United States. They crept around the mansion unbeknownst to the female creatures, until Rick Ross clumsily dropped a jar of peanut butter while “investigating” the kitchen cupboards. A great battle ensued, where the four heroes were split up and Nicki kidnapped.

After each rapper had successfully killed the white bitches that were trying to consume their souls, they recharged their powers by rapping alone in various rooms. Once they were fully charged, they regrouped and fought their way to the missing Minaj, located in the basement and guarded by the cult leader who had transformed into an evil version herself. The three men combined their powers (Kanye’s ego, Jay-Z’s money and Ross’ plump physique) to defeat the cult leader, thus freeing Nicki and allowing them to continue their vanquishing of evil elsewhere.